Welp, another season gone by. Remember when we all despised Revenge of the Island and it was only mildly bad in hindsight? Yeah, TDAS goes beyond mildly bad. I’m not even going to give it an /10 just because I’ll probably sob when I come up with a number. Anyway, I’ll go through a brief analysis of each character and element of the season. Anyway, let’s put this hell-sent season to bed.
Surprisingly, Alejandro was one of the few characters to significantly improve this season. If he hadn’t had spent the first six episodes WALKING ON HIS HANDS WITH NO REASONABLE EXPLANATION, he’d probably land a spot in my top 10. In World Tour, I didn’t care much for Alejandro. His character was a bit flat, and his only purpose was to be the main villain and to like, intercourse with Heather. I felt that Alex House really did a good job with giving Alejandro much more of a clear character this season. While I prefer Marco’s voice, he wasn’t really a good actor. Then again, what do you expect? Tom probably went up to his local Taco Bell and payed the first employee he noticed. Anyway, Alejandro was one of the more dignified characters this season. He wasn’t particularly funny, but he was at least a refreshing and, hey, strategic contestant. When was the last time we saw strategy in TD, like, ever? Not to mention that Alejandro had probably the only great interaction, or even relatively good, with Mal. ily Alejandro make love to me bby.
Not only is Cameron DETESTABLY HIDEOUS, but he overstayed his welcome for too long. I mean, Cameron was a finalist of last season. Sure, Owen returned in Action, but yeah, no one really liked that anyway. But the difference between Owen and Cameron is that Owen is actually funny and likable, whereas Cameron is a horrible human being. I don’t know why Cameron couldn’t have been eliminated in Moon Madness. Would ANYTHING really change if he was? But since Ed MacDonald has some sexual obsession with Cameron, we had to watch more of Cameron’s sexual obsession with Mike and Zoey. He didn’t even do anything in the first four episodes this season. Was his weird friendship with Gwen so crucially important that they had to extend his time on the show? It’s bad enough that I have to suffer through his vomit inducing design. And really, he had no part in furthering Mal’s storyline. Zoey didn’t learn anything from it, and Cameron barely tried to help his friend. WHY DID WE NEED CAMERON IN THIS SEASON? TO EVEN OUT THE UGLY PEOPLE RATIO? Well, for whatever reason, Cameron will forever land second to last in my rankings.
Aside from Gwen, Courtney was the most inconsistent throughout this season. I mean, she would go from unusually nice and giddy to an extreme and unnatural level of psychopathy. Her character was headed in the exact right direction, too. She was finally distancing herself from Duncan, only for her other two story arcs, Scourtney and Gwentney, to land her back at square one again. And you know it’s bad when Courtney fans are complaining about her. To be honest, I liked her in quite a few episodes this season… even… Sundae Muddy Sundae. Okay, yeah, it was a stupid way to end her story arc. But for me, that felt like the Courtney I’ve watched for four seasons. You Regatta Be Kidding featured the most surreal and deranged Courtney of all time. I mean, I know we’ve seen her giddy before. BUT JESUS. And what was that line of hers?
So it was hard to really enjoy Courtney this season when she changed so drastically from episode to episode. We never even got a resolution to her friendship with Gwen or relationship with Scott. GOD.
Duncan was a bit of a mixed bag. I kind of liked where his story arc was going, but, like Courtney, it was abandoned and never to be spoken of again. For the first three episodes, Duncan did little to nothing besides being in an incredibly awkward relationship with Gwen. He started to actually do something in Food Fright, when he began his transition into a hero. This was mostly played for laughs in No One Eggpects, and ehhh, it didn’t really work there. It was a bit too exaggerated for my tastes. Suckers Punched was really the one episode where I think it was very well done. It’s really the only episode where it was both funny and you could sympathize with Duncan as well. But since the writers are too afraid to change characters that we’ll probably never see again after this season, Duncan ends up going to jail in the next episode for blowing up Play- SORRY, CHRIS’S “COTTAGE”. Also, I know it was on purpose, but did Duncan just seem like a giant wuss this season to begin with? I don’t know what happened to him between TDWT and TDAS. Did he start going to church and eventually found a role in the home of Christianity? Well, whatever it was, Duncan was mildly entertaining this season, even though his development completely stopped in its tracks.
Well, if you were wondering what happened to Duncan over the course of two seasons, I’m dying to know what the hell happened to Gwen. I find that the four writers have four completely different perspectives of this character.
Laurie Elliot: An unhealthily strong attraction to Courtney.
Alex Ganetaknosofonomos: Kind of normal-ish but when did Gwen ever really care about teamwork? In Heroes vs. Villains and Private Leechball she’s like, obsessed with it. It’s as if she’s secretly having sex with teamwork behind Duncan and Courtney’s backs.
Terry McGurrin: Probably the best for Gwen even though in all of his episodes she freaks out at least six times and I don’t like when Megan Fahlenblock SHOUTS IN MY EAR.
Ed MacDonald: I really can’t figure out his interpretation of Gwen. It’s like Tom told Ed that Gwen was some mood-swingy version of Zoey who’s also pregnant and experiencing some troubling side effects.
Of all the veterans this season, I really could not stand Gwen. She felt like a completely different character. I mean, I get that people change over time, but it would’ve helped to see a transition into this. Why was she unnecessarily brash to Duncan when he brought up Courtney TWICE? Why was Gwen so preoccupied with making up with Courtney when they were barely even close friends to begin with? Really, this could’ve been Gwen’s season. Seeing all the horse feces thrown at her in TDA and TDWT, this could’ve been a chance to redeem her. Why couldn’t we have gotten a Courtney and Gwen final two and just stuck with that storyline for the whole season? And why did Gwuncan have to break up to begin with? Nothing would have made a difference. It really only makes it more vomit-worthy that she’s become a part of the Mike-Zoey-Cameron sewing circle. God, back in TDI, she would never be friends with a DORKWAD like Cameron. In conclusion, by the time Moon Madness came, Gwen was left with nothing to do for the rest of the season, leaving her as being a pretty blank slate, like most contestants who aren’t named Mike and Zoey. And what was up with her hitting Heather in the finale?! When has Heather ever done anything to her in recent history?! Definitely the worst case of derailment for an otherwise good character.
One of the better, yet underused characters this season, Heather was pretty well written. Though, it was pretty easy to forget her as well. The Aleheather story arc wasn’t bad, but it really wasn’t shoved in our faces as much as the other arcs. I still stand in saying that Rachel Wilson is one of the best voice actors on the show in just how much commitment and power she can put into her performance. Why did Heather wear a ponytail this season, though? I mean, I know the animators are addicted to changing her hairstyle, but why not like, curl it or braid it or something? I dunno. The only problem is how much they underwhelmed her strategic methods this season. The “Heather crossing her fingers” thing could’ve went somewhere, but nope, WE NEED MORE TIME FOR THE SINISTER MAL!!!!! Also, I didn’t get what Heather acting nice really accomplished. And why did she need to hide the idol, besides giving her a reason to be eliminated? Well, whatever the reason, she at least stayed in character throughout her run. I really wish they kept up the Heather-Jo conflict. It was really more intriguing than any of interaction. Being probably TD’s most consistent contestants, Heather will always find a way in my top characters.
The renowned and beautiful Jo. While her run on All-Stars was cut short, she had one redeeming quality that made her one of the series’ greatest and more influential characters of all time.
… HER SWEATPANTS.
Just look at the casual yet refined way her gray dims the spotlight. You can almost feel the polyester rubbing against your thighs. With such a classic blend of cotton and elastic, Jo’s sweatpants can stretch you into a different world of baggy and loose quality. It’s amazing how rebelliously she takes a stand against the world by showing off such a daring ensemble that most people would only wear at sporting events. Just the way she prides around in her luscious pair of soft trousers is enough to give every diseased patient a reason to keep fighting and making their way up in the world. She doesn’t go for such risque and mainstream yoga pants or plain shorts, NO, she takes a RISE AGAINST SOCIETY TO PROUDLY PROCLAIM “HEY WORLD, I’M JO, AND I WEAR GRAY SWEATPANTS.” With all the unjust and provocative prejudice Jo gets on a daily basis, it only shows how much willpower she has to show the world that she can find a place in the world with these fabric joggers and displays such an emotional stance of courage and heart. Well done, Jo. Well done.
After Heroes vs. Villains, I had declared Lightning as All-Stars’ best character. Unfortunately, he stayed for one episode. Yay? I really don’t get why they chose to boot him so early. I mean, I guess he was the only one who really had nothing going on, but Lightning was at least the best source of comic relief that this season had to offer. SEXY BEAST. It’s almost insulting that we didn’t get to see Lightning in the finale. Here’s an idea, why couldn’t they have had Cameron go home and kept Lightning instead? Maybe Lightning could’ve had a story arc where he began to catch onto Mal, but still continued to make love to himself. Or, maybe, we could’ve gotten that Jo-Lightning alliance at the beginning of the season that was never spoken of ever again. Oh well. Lightning is still one of the highlights of this season.
I usually count Staci as the epitome of filler, but Staci at least appeared in more than one episode of Revenge of the Island. I don’t even know why Lindsay was chosen to go so early. Her character had a chance to expand on a bit. And we didn’t even get a Tyler mention! Oh well, nothing I can really talk about here. Lindsay’s presence wasn’t bad, but they kind of dumbed her down to pretty severe lengths.
Everything that’s been said is enough to know why I’ve grown to hate this character. Like Mygeto had mentioned in the comments, Mal is a complete waste of a villain who only covered his tracks and had no real affect on the game whatsoever. It’s entirely frustrating to focus so much time on a character who does nothing to further anything. Also, this season has shown just how offensive Mike can be. A reset button? That’s NOT how you fix a mental disorder. Like someone else mentioned, mental disorders usually require a lifetime of therapy and can be managed, but will never completely go away. Now, that doesn’t mean that a person can’t enjoy life because of it. But it’s DISGUSTING that Mike gets cured of something by the touch of a button. You know what would’ve been a better lesson? Mike gaining control and telling Zoey that there’s nothing he can do about his personas, but Zoey still accepting him for it and agreeing to help him with it. It’s really not as likable as it seems that Mike would completely beat his disorder. Also, it’s insulting to the audience that Mike made it this far in the first place. He was barely present for the actual competition, so what has he actually done to deserve the million dollars? If they wanted to do an endearing story and include the mental struggles that Mike goes through on a daily basis, that’s fine, but it’s incredibly defaming to treat an actual real life mental condition as some quirk that can be fixed by tiny versions of yourself in your brain. I tried to defend Mike’s MPD at first, but there’s no denying how terrible this portrayal was.
Besides being a reason for Brian Froud to get a paycheck, I don’t see any reason as to why Sam was in this season. I originally thought that they were hyping him up to be the main protagonist of the season, but he ended up just being a lame pain gag. I mean, Sam placed 10th last season. What reason was there for him to compete in this season? Here’s an idea, how about putting BRICK in? I know I’ve complained about this enough, but I suspect that TDAS would be slightly less terrible if we had a little more Brick. But anyway, I really don’t have much of an opinion on Sam. I just don’t really know why he exists.
Ladies and gentlemen, please take off your hat and acknowledge the greatest character to ever grace TDAS’s presence.
Scott is the greatest thing to ever grace my presence. Just look at the way he eats dirt as his buttocks get injured. I don’t even know where this funny and likable character came from, seeing how there is no clear connection between his character in TDRI and TDAS. But who cares? It’s MOTHA FREAKIN SCOTT MAN. This dude gives freckles a new name. Sure, his only story arc this season was his relationship with Courtney, which went absolutely nowhere, but who cares? IT’S MOTHA FREAKIN SCOTT MAN. I think anyone who is anyone can agree that Scott is TDAS’s MVP. Just look at the way he comically mistakes a literal wedge for a WEDGE OF CHEESE. HOW LUDICROUS! Just watch how he basks in the scent of his armpits. Can you imagine a life without Scotty boy in it? I love you more than everything I stand for Scott. I’ll walk the entire world to get you back into my life. SCOTT FOR PAHKITEW. SCOTT FOR TOTAL DRAMA PAHKITEW ISLAND.
While Sierra remains my favorite character in TD, I felt they didn’t really know what to do with her this season. I mean, sure, she was hilarious, but they definitely took a heavy increase on only one part of her character: the obsessive stalker. In World Tour, Sierra was a team player and cared greatly for challenges, but was crippled by an unhealthy obsession with Cody. Well, now it’s mostly just her unhealthy obsession with Cameron. Though, the rat babies was an odd yet nice touch. But yeah, I felt she was more of a comedic prop than a developed character this season. I would kind of prefer if she was obsessed with everyone for a change of things and just blogged all season, but I guess you gotta take what you get. And Sierra was decent for what we got. I still luv her doe. I’m just baffled as to how we never saw Cody.
Well, you all know I hate Zoey. And yeah, I really do. If you want to know why, you can just read my other blogs. I’ve bashed her enough. Well, not completely. It just annoys me how she made it the far into the season when she really had nothing going for her. She began as bland and Mike dependent and left bland and Mike dependent. The only chance of development was her friendship with Duncan, which, you guessed it, went nowhere. I don’t know how the writers enjoyed writing for Zoey. Again, her only source of a story comes from Mike. What was her first line of the season? Mike. Who was she worried about all season? Mike. What was her biggest fear this season? Losing Mike. Of all the characters in TD, I hope I never have to see Zoey again. Watching her all season was completely painful. I don’t think she has a single redeeming quality left. But again, all of my problems with Zoey are stated in my previous blogs. If I were to post them all here, you’d be reading this blog all day.
All-Stars probably has the worst cast of characters. The only characters I thoroughly enjoyed were Alejandro, Scott, Heather, and Sierra. I don’t count Lightning or Jo because they barely even stepped foot on this season. Everyone was either a mixed bag or plain terrible. I almost wish that World Tour was the last season we saw the veterans compete.
Dear LORD. Okay, again, Gwuncan started off pretty awkwardly. I guess you could tell they were having problems in their relationship, but you know, I liked it. Then Evil Dread came and Gwen started ignoring Duncan for like, no reason. Okay. Cool Gwen. Then in Private Leechball Gwen flipped out on Duncan and then he sacrificed himself for her and Gwen’s all “damn man now I feel bad”. So we then go to Food Fright, and Gwen vomits on Duncan. Okay. Nothing of importance in this episode. Then we go to Moon Madness, where Gwen freaks out at Duncan for mentioning Courtney even though she kind of CRIED OVER HER THE PREVIOUS EPISODE. Then Duncan mentions Courtney again, which, yeah was stupid, but Gwen BROKE UP WITH HIM OVER THE COURSE OF ONE SECOND. AND THEY NEVER RESOLVE THIS. WHA. I. EXCUSE ME? IT TOOK GWEN FOUR EPISODES TO DEAL WITH TRENT’S KINKY GWEN IDOLIZATION, WHY DOES IT TAKE TWO SCENES TO BREAK UP GWUNCAN? If any other couple broke up like this, I’d still be pissed. But the fact that it was my favorite couple of the series is DISTASTEFUL. And yeah, that means that the only original couples remaining are Tyler and Lindsay, Gigette, and Aleheather. Yup. Tyler and Lindsay. Isn’t that FRIGGIN’ DANDY?
I don’t even know what this is. I mean, it started with Scott eating food off of Courtney’s face. Aight. It was at least developed at bit in Moon Madness, but they rushed the shizz out of it. Courtney suddenly started caring about Scott at the beginning of the episode, even though she nearly killed him the previous one. No One Eggspects was the only episode where they were written like an actual TD couple, and yeah, it was pretty well done. I thought the holding hands scene was pretty cute, and it gave us a side of Scott we don’t usually see. And then No One Eggspects is pretty much where it ends as a relationship and begins to be a gag. I mean, I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t funny in Zeek And Ye Shall Find, but I prefer a proper relationship. That’s not to say it can’t be humorous, but I’d like it if the writers at least took it seriously. But why take it seriously, seeing how it doesn’t exist anymore at the end of the season? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Sierra and Cameron
Excuse me while I vomit.
The only well done couple this season. Well, I don’t even know if I can count it as a couple until the finale, since everything prior was just sexual tension. And in the finale, they were pretty ehhh. Well, at least at the beginning. I know them being in love with each other was played as a joke, but that sexual tension relationship they were going for was good enough. It’s kind of a shame that the best couple of the season gets the least focus, besides No One Eggspects. Oh well, I still ship Aleheather. Mmmm.
Still my least favorite couple of all time. And at this point, it isn’t even just because how bland and incompatible they are together, it’s the unhealthy way they’re portrayed. Zoey is the only one who can take Mike out of his MPD, and Mike got cured solely for the wellbeing of Zoey. And while I don’t think it’s a bad thing that Mike loves Zoey, but I think it’s going a step too far that Mike can only manage his MPD when Zoey is there for him. Being too dependent on anyone isn’t healthy. At the end of the day, the only person who can make you happy is yourself. The moral that love can solve all problems is really stretching things. Yes, love can help cope with problems, but if it solves a problem, that isn’t healthy. What if Zoey broke up with Mike? Would his MPD come back? It’s just a very unrealistic way of portraying love that I think would discourage me more than encourage. But other than that, they’re a gelatinous blob of kindness and I hope Zoey’s tongue gets stuck in Mike’s buck tooth.
Since I’ve already reviewed all the episodes, I go through brief thoughts on them all.
Heroes vs. Villains
GOOD STUFF. Kind of weird writing sometimes but a pretty great challenge and a solid entrance into the season with some promising stuff and HEY CAMERON BARELY TALKED.
Good episode and a good way of hyping up Mal and the challenge was pretty quiet and stuff so we had more room for interaction.
Saving Private Leechball
Good shizzam another great interaction challenge and some pretty cool stuff like the team swap actually made sense and Gwuncan <333333.
Good stuff and the first legit shocker in a while and a quality ass challenge.
This episode is a literal piece of excrement. Nothing good happened in this episode. Gwuncan broke up, Heather did something completely random, Cameron got saved from elimination and swapped onto the other team for no reason whatsoever, Gwen was a dumbass, Courtney was blood-thirsty, and nothing went right.
No One Eggspects the Spanish Opposition
Good episode mostly cause of the Alejandro and Heather interactions and Scourtney was cool. GWEN AND CAMERON’S FRIENDSHIP EW.
GREAT EPISODE, even though Courtney and Gwen were kinda gross. But it had Izzy and Doey and Jose and all that fun stuff. RIP Sierra doe
You Regatta Be Kidding Me
Booooo this episode sucks boooo. Zoey tried to commit suicide and we focused so much in Mike’s brain as if anyone actually cares. Also, Duncan got arrested for no reason and Gwen was so rude and Gwentney was disgusting and vomit-inducing.
Zeek And Ye Shall Find
It was okay I mean the challenge was basically walking for 22 minutes. Nothing that interesting. RIP Ezekiel doe.
The Obsta-Kill Kourse
I don’t even remember this episode what happened.
Sundae Muddy Sundae
Ugggh Courtney uggggh.
The Bold and the Booty-ful
die TDA die die DIE.
The Final Wreck-ening
KILL TDAS. owen <3
Probably the worst team ever existing. The only saving graces were Courtney, Sierra, and Duncan, and even they couldn’t defeat Mike, Zoey, and Cameron’s power of niceness. The only enjoyable interaction to come out of this team was Duncan and Zoey, but hey, guess what? IT WENT NOWHERE. Sierra and Cameron’s interactions were gross, Mike and Zoey were terrible per usual, Mike and Cameron were terrible per usual, Cameron and Zoey were terrible per usual, and Courtney left before she could have any actual interactions with any of the Hamsters. Did Sam even talk to anyone? Besides that one conversation with Sierra? But yeah, the interactions on this team barely existed since everyone was so God damn focused on Mal.
Pretty solid team. The interactions were nicely done. Heather and Jo was one of my favorites of the season even though it lasted, what, two episodes? Jo and Lightning was nice too, even though it lasted one. I enjoyed Gwen’s conflict with her entire team. Gwuncan was nice before Duncan left the villains. And Courtney and Heather’s ongoing conflict is always welcome. The only pointless thing about this team is how Cameron was placed on it when it affected nothing in the face of humanity. Besides. You know. Gwen and Cameron’s friendship. God. Not to mention that Alejandro and Gwen NEVER EXISTED OUTSIDE OF EPISODE 3.
I don’t know what to think of this season. Well, yeah I do, it sucked. The characters were messy, the good to bad episode ratio was off, the relationships were mediocre, nobody properly developed, we focused entirely too much on Mike and Zoey, and continuity barely existed. I don’t know how they screwed up a season with FOUR WRITERS, but I’m just putting all my hope in that Pahkitew will redeem my faith in the series. So, with all the bad things, what’s something positive I have to say about this season?
It’s… funny? Blergh.