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Zeek And Ye Shall Find

Can we take the time to acknowledge how colossally gigantic Chef is? His friggin’ palm is bigger than Gwen’s head. Anyways, welcome back to another review, where I'll be taking on the 100th episode. I feel like this was a little undermined for such a big milestone. Then again, they probably just threw this little tidbit in because we mentioned it to them a while ago.

Chris really needs to do something about that cough that he only has during recaps. I didn't even know Chris knew Mal existed. I guess he just enjoys the fact that Mike is having a mental breakdown, just like us viewers at home are supposed to. Except Chris doesn't realize it's wrong, while we realize that it's violently offensive. Alejandro takes a hot tub. I wish I could take a hot tub with Alejandro. With that hot tub music that used to play but doesn't play anymore. Kinda wish the butler had his own plotline, about how his adopted son found himself feeling distant from his non-biological father, so the butler must help his adopted son find his real parents, and maybe even find a little something about himself. Chris skinny dips in the hot tub with Alejandro. I wish I could skinny dip in a hot tub with Alejandro. The audience is reminded that Alejandro's Spanish (NO ONE EGGSPECTED THAT), as he discovers Chris's monitor room.

"Mal's greatest hits... how interesting."

I think you're confused, Alejandro. The only thing written on that label is a squiggly line. Alejandro puts the disk in, and the clips of Mal's devious and vile... breaking of electronics and tripping people... play.

"Hola, strange one. What are you up to?"

yeah okay you're Spanish I understand. I'm digging the Al-Mal interactions. Outside, we see that the Blandtastic Bores discussing Cameron's elimination, when really, they should be discussing why it didn't actually happen. I swear, Ed MacDonald has some sort of weird obsession with Cameron. Is it the shape of his head or something? Does Ed MacDonald appreciate the roundness of Cameron's head? We get a cameo from Mr. Coconut. I think Christian Potenza just hacked into the animation studio and added this scene in. What are they even looking for? Why would their be clues as to why Cameron was eliminated? Granted, there are clues, but only because Mal deliberately placed them there. Are Zoey and Cameron just looking for a magical leprechaun that has it out for Cameron so he swapped the votes?

"Anything you can do, I can do better."

HEY, THAT'S AN EPISODE TITLE. Terry McGurrin wrote that episode. Terry McGurrin wrote this episode. All the pieces match up. Mike tries to defend himself, but then Cameron like, loses his s**t.

"NONE OF IT DOES! It's unlike any equation I've ever encountered."

Alright, you need to take a Xanax, buddy.

"I'm the new Lightning! Sha-something!"

Why did you have to mention that name? That name is sacred and should not be tampered with.

Sha-Jesus


I always enjoy when Chris swags out on the P.A. system. Anyway, Scott falls, and Courtney comes out of his side of the cabin, for some reason. Wouldn’t it be weird if cabins were co-ed? You’d have to deal with Courtney and Gwen’s foolin’ around all night. Kisses in TD are literally so awkward. How is flopping upon someone, as your lips coincidentally smash into each other passionate in any way?

Will you be my boyfriend? Uh, no, my boyfriend.”

Trying to tell us something there, buddy? Also, when did Scott suddenly become a likable and rounded character? He was a flat pancake of antagonism last season, and he’s suddenly formed a character this season. Like I said before, he’s kind of like Ezekiel, besides, you know, the whole BEING GREEN thing. I think it’s funny that this clip was shown in the preview, too. Because it’s not like the forming of a relationship is in any way an important factor in Total Drama. Meanwhile, Mal is up to some totally tubular schemes. He tells Cameron that Scott, Courtney, Alejandro, and Gwen were talking about him, since Courtney, Scott, and Gwen are clearly staying at the spa hotel with Alejandro.

Thanks pals, sorry I said I couldn’t trust you. Obviously I can!

Of course you can, Cameron. It’s only your friend Mike, who has been acting more suspicious than usual lately and also has multiple personality disorder which you have an extensive knowledge of and helped prove this the previous episode, while he also supplied you with information with no actual proof supporting his case along with the fact that Scott slept with you in the same room and you most likely heard Courtney and Gwen’s funny business in the other room the previous night, so there’s no reason as to why they’d be having a slumber party with Alejandro, making Mike’s point invalid to begin with. Totally trustworthy.

"Uh, are you okay?" "Hmph!"

This is the reason Cameron bugs me. Not only because he’s stupid for believing someone he barely trusts, but because he doesn’t at least ASK Gwen about what Mal told him. Pretty much the same problems that Zoey has: He’s annoying, dumb, and is too quick to believe a person when he literally has pointed out eighty five times in the past two episodes that he doesn’t trust Mike. Chris comes on the monitor and announces a special surprise for the 100th episode. Maybe it's an episode with well written characters. Oh, hey Ezekiel. Sup, broski. Zeke ends up murdering Chris and dragging his corpse off set. Hey, Ezekiel and I have something in common. ... Don't repeat that.

"To the mine!"

Chef's passionate love for Chris gives me butterflies.

"It's our one hour anniversary, and three's a crowd. Bye!" "Hehehehe, sorry!"

Why is Gwen not legitimately pissed off at Courtney? She spent the entire season sobbing over her and broke up with Duncan so they could be butt buddies, and Courtney literally ditches her an episode later. I guess her lust for Courtney is too strong.

"Al-ay-handro?"

CAN THE CONTESTANTS ON THIS SHOW LEARN HOW TO SAY ALEJANDRO'S NAME? When did Gwen and Cameron even become friends? All they did was stand in No One Eggspects The Spanish Opposition. How bout Leshanwa, huh? How bout the girl that dumped feces on your enemy for kissing your boyfriend? Are we just going to forget she exists?! Scott's not a smart fella. I'm surprised Courtney even likes him. She wanted to change nearly everything about Duncan. How bout making Scott stop sniffing his pits in public? It upsets me.

"I have no idea how to be a boyfriend. The only advice my dad gave me was 'if you're ever in Holland, go Dutch.' ... Oh, I get it now!"

GLORIOUS INNUENDO. I don't know how Gwen can remember she's claustrophobic when she can't even remember that Duncan and Courtney dated. Alejandro ends up in a real rocky situation, as his boot gets stuck by a stone. My last name is Stone. I'd wish Alejandro could get stuck in me. Why doesn't Alejandro just slip out of his boot? He doesn't really think that hardly. He spent eight hours trying to fix his engine last episode before he finally stuck his nose out. The one time walking of his hands would actually benefit him. Ezekiel ties Chris over a can of toxic waste, and we get a charming image of Ezekiel drooling. Anyway, Gwen starts freaking out, since she's alone. Which is weird, because Zoey jumped in a millisecond after her. I like that fat intern. Chef's probably had more dialogue in this episode than he's had in the past two seasons.

After we return from a series of uninteresting commercials, Gwen like, freaks out when Zoey appears. I'd probably do the same thing. So... Zoey... makes gwen blow out a candle. Okay.

"Man, she's good!"

... At what? Breathing? Mike and Cameron then have a conversation about how they don't deserve to still be characters on this show, as Mal urges Cameron to kiss Courtney. Hey, it'll be Courtney's first love interest who isn't evil. Alejandro is just now getting out of his boot. Sha-Jesus, they must've been in that mine for like, six days now.

"Adios, beautiful bota. Your brother will surely miss you!"

WE GET IT ALEJANDRO, YOU ARE SPANISH. WE COMPREHEND WHAT IS GOING ON. Man, they're really building up Ezekiel. Maybe in the outcome, he won't be GREEN anymore. Ezekiel then captures Zoey, and Gwen has like... a spasm in the confessional. Calm down, dude. It's only Zoey. Not someone important, like the pudgy intern. Chef having the spasm in the confessional was hilarious, though. God, why is Scott so funny and likable? It feels odd to enjoy his presence.

"Courtney, I'm your girlfriend!"

Seriously, dude. If you need something to confess, just come on the wiki. We'll understand. Ew, Cameron kissing Courtney is icky. The Scott-Courtney interactions in this scene are great. I think this episode is probably the most likable Courtney's been all season. And Chef, considering this is the first time he's done something. Besides checking out Chris. Hm, Courtney and Scott break up almost as fast as they got together.

"The sad part is, this isn't the worst party I've ever been to."

This was kind of funny, but it made me depressed. Cameron then falls into a hole, as he hangs on for dear life. no. Mike help. he could die. Mike stop. where are you going. well gee whiz, I guess Cameron's left to die and there's nothing we can do. I'm a bad person. Alejandro approaches Cameron.

"All-ee-jandro!"

Why do I even bother.

"Grab hold, little one." "No! I only trust Zoey and Mike! I don't want help from anyone else!"

Nah, it's cool, you're right. Dying is MUCH better than putting trust in someone who might try something so devious and maniacal as to VOTE YOU OFF!

"He will fall, and his landing will not be soft."

Christ. Everyone seems to handle death pretty easily on this show. Chef eats all the ice cream, which leaves none for our festively plump intern, as he pulls out his spaghetti gun. Dass how Chef rolls. I like Terry McGurrin, but he always has the most irrelevant jokes in his episodes. Like the Sam jellyfish joke. This episode has the fudge joke. Irrelevant poop and pee jokes are only humorous when I do them, and they're only humorous for me, while they aren't for the rest of the world. Just like my reviews. Cameron falls to his death, as him and Gwen have a touching reunion. This would be a bit more believable if they were actually friends for more than, I don't know, two seconds? At least that nice piano music plays.

"Cam? Buddy? You still there? You won't be for long!"

DAMN. Also, what's with Mal/Mike's obsession with rocks? And it's not like they have upper-arm strength. How can they just typically carry a boulder around? Hey, Zoey, why don't you use your amazing superpowers that only come out every now and then when you're supposed to make your team look good to get out of the cage?

"So you just left him hanging there? Not cool."

Hey, it's A Hundredth Episode Special at Hanging Dork. Oooh shizzle, Alejandro's onto Mal. CHEF TO RESCUE. This scene would be kind of suspenseful, if we didn't already get the Pahkitew storyboard and knew that Chris doesn't get mutated in any way. Chref. <3

"Zeke, Zeke, let's talk about this."

Yeah, let's talk about this Zeke, then maybe ye shall find.

"You saved my life, I owe you this."

Alright, settle down there, Cam. EW, I DIDN'T NEED TO SEE ZEKE VOMIT ON CAMERON. So, Cameron gets crushed by a pile of rocks.

"THIS, is for Cameron!"

Ugh. Zeke then vanishes, which means we all have to suffer by seeing him in another episode. This is probably the first time Chris used the confessional in like, four years. Gwen then wins immunity for the first time since Wawanakwa Gone Wild!. Man, Gwen sucks. Alejandro is sent to Boney Island, so at least I can spend time with his lusciousness for another episode. Cameron is FINALLY in a bubble. And he's also finally gone.

Anyway, this was a moderately good episode. It had a lot of laughs, and nothing particularly bad, besides the typical Zeke bashing, but I still found it rather forgettable. Nothing really stood out to make this a phenomenal episode, but I guess it stands as a decent episode. The Chef scenes were definitely what stole the show, along with the Scourtney scenes. Alejandro and Mal were cool, while Cameron, Zoey, and Gwen continued to be from eh to incredibly annoying. Overall, a decently good episode, with nothing bad, but nothing specifically great. Excuse me while I go invite over our entire country to celebrate Cameron's departure.

FINAL RATING: 7.2

+ Chef and Scourtney scenes

+ Lack of Mike and more of Mal

+ Cameron finally being eliminated

- Meh challenge

- Zeke

- Underwhelming 100th episode

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